It's the Heart Not the Hemline: A Biblical Unit Study on Modesty was written by Lindsey Stomberg and Richele McFarlin. Read below to hear what Richele has to say about the heart behind this joint project.
Dressing the Heart
“How does a woman discern the sometimes fine line between proper dress and dressing to be the center of attention? The answer starts in the intent of her heart. A woman should examine her motives and goals for the way she dresses. Is her intent to show the grace and beauty of womanhood? Is it to reveal a humble heart devoted to worshipping God? Or is it to call attention to herself, and flaunt her … beauty? Or worse, to attempt to allure men sexually? A woman who focuses on worshipping God will consider carefully how she is dressed, because her heart will dictate her wardrobe and appearance.” -John MacArthur
Years ago, I hosted a modest fashion show with a friend. Our purpose was twofold; to address the practical and spiritual applications of modesty. On a practical level, we wanted to dispel the myth that modesty is synonymous with frumpy. On a spiritual level, we wanted to refocus modesty on the heart and not the outward appearance. We named our fashion show, Dressing the Heart, to showcase the conviction in our hearts.
Without realizing it, we headed straight into a storm of controversy. We were accused of being arrogant and legalistic. Others were thankful we had the heart to bring this topic to the forefront. We never intended to provide a dress code. We wanted young girls to value who they are in Christ.
It's the Heart Not the Hemline: A Biblical Unit Study on Modesty
So, here I am today presenting you with a study on the heart of modesty. I am not here to provide you a dress code. I firmly believe clothing choices fall under your authority based on how the Lord is leading your family. It’s the Heart, not the Hemline: A Biblical Unit Study on Modesty, focuses on addressing the heart issues which leads to a heart willing to please Christ in how a young girl presents herself. Lindsey and I added in journal sheets for parents to record their thoughts on each lesson so aid you in training your daughter in this area. This study is to aid you in guiding your daughter’s heart in modesty not to provide a list of rules.
During the course of writing this study, I discovered that many moms were having difficulty teaching their daughters about proper dress. Many felt convicted to change their own dress and wanted their daughters to follow in their footsteps. Many others felt they didn’t know where to start since they were new to Christ. These challenges arise when we approach modesty backwards; from the hemline first then the heart. You see, the length of your skirt does not convict your heart. The heart must be convicted in order to make changes for Christ. Of course we
want our daughters to dress in a fashion that honors Christ . Yes, they need our guidance which leads us to develop house rules. Let’s just make sure we focus on the heart behind our house rules.
So, Where Do You Start?
First you start by studying with your daughter. If you are new to Christ and not sure where to begin then don’t be afraid to tell her that. Let her know that your heart wants to serve Christ and desire to raise her in a God honoring fashion. Tell her that you are still learning and want to share a study with her so you can grow together in Christ.
Lindsey and I would like to believe this study is a good starting point to open up the discussion which will lead to gaining wisdom in modesty. Whether you feel confident in instructing your daughter or not, you will be blessed by the time spent in the Word together through this study.
It’s the Heart not the Hemline: A Biblical Unit Study on Modesty, is designed to be a five week unit study and journal. This resource is best used for girls ages 10 years and older.
What Does This Biblical Unit Study on Modesty Include?
- 5 Weeks of Lessons
- What is Modesty?
- Modest Heart
- Modest Appearance
- Modest Speech
- Modest Behavior
- Memory Verse Printables and Activities (KJV and ESV Included)
- Scripture Cards
- Copywork (Print and Cursive)
- Memory Verse Games
- Memory Verse Flash Cards
- Memory Verse Quizzes
- Activity Printables
- SPA Night Recipes
- My Prayer Log
- Symptom of a Prideful or Humble Heart Worksheet
- Journal of Loving Thoughts
- Greeting Cards
- "I am" Activity
- Encouraging Picture Frames
- First Impressions Charades Game
- Notes of Encouragement
- Two-in-One Matching Game
- Day 1: Topic for the Week: Lesson on an aspect of modesty.
- Day 2: Character Trait: Lesson on a character trait associated with the previous lesson.
- Day 3: Let’s Explore: A deeper look and further exploration of the topic.
- Day 4: Heart Exam: Focuses on the heart aspect of that week’s lesson topic.
- Day 5: Connecting the Dots: Wraps up the week with final thoughts to complete the week.
Samantha Says: A youthful perspective from 17 year old, Samantha Shank.
Moms Says & Dad Says: A place for mom and dad to write their thoughts and notes for their daughter. Gather the pages together into a journal for your daughter to reflect back on when the study is over.
- Lesson: Short but substantial lesson which unveils the simplicity and heart behind aspects of modesty.
- Scripture Connection/Scripture Memory: On the first day you are given your memory verse and directed to use the provided copywork page to reinforce the verse. The second day is Index Card Memorization. The next two days the child can pick a memory verse activity. The final day a memory verse quiz is provided. *Copywork, memory verse activities, and quizzes, provided in Memory Verse Printables and Activities, are in the back of the book.
- Questions for Reflection: Questions to engage the student and bring a deeper understanding.
- Activity: A fun activity to end the lesson. Some printables provided.
Print off on copy of “My Prayer Log” on page 109 for each week. Combine the “My Prayer Log” with “Mom Says
& Dad Says” into a binder to create your modesty journal. You may want to include memory verses, your favorite
activities from this book, or your own insights.